No matter how much you think you have Gastroparesis beat, you never fully do. There will always be a setback that hits you. For me, it always seems to be when there is a large shift in the weather. It is so incredibly frustrating to be on a good path and then something completely out of your control throws a wrench into the whole scheme. It’s in these moments that I hate Gastroparesis the most. It’s in these moments that I struggle to stay positive and keep fighting. It’s in these moments that I have a hard time fending off the depression and self-doubt. Today has been one of those moments.
The weather had a giant shift yesterday which wreaked havoc on me and my Gastroparesis. I have been fatigued and this morning had extremely horrible stomach cramping. I stand by my acupuncture post from yesterday, because even though I faced this setback I noticed that my body is bouncing back faster than it did before the acupuncture treatments. It still doesn’t bounce back as quickly as I would like, but something is better than nothing.
This morning was not only filled with fatigue and severe stomach cramps but was also filled with self-doubt and depression. What is my point in life? Why was I changing my diet, taking supplements, blending my food, getting acupuncture just to remain sick? Why do I always have to get sick? Why don’t more people know about Gastroparesis? Why keep fighting it? Is the blog really helping anyone? Should I keep doing the blog? The list goes on and on and on. These moments are EXTREMELY difficult to pull yourself out of. Once the snowball starts rolling it takes a giant yeti to make it stop.
Somehow, someway I was able to get the snowball to stop. Maybe it’s because I had to force myself out of bed to get some work done.. Maybe it’s because my dog was insistent that I needed all the kisses she could give me. Maybe it’s because I saw an adorable photo of my friend’s baby in a safari hat. Maybe it’s because my amazingly calm and supportive boyfriend was saying all of the right things. Maybe it’s because I know I’m meant to make a difference for the Gastroparesis community. Whatever the reason was, I was able to slowly snap myself out of the funk today. I’m not fully out of it but still slowly getting there. I saw the image for today’s blog & I think it will be my new motto: Chin up buttercup!
Ever since I found the image, I’ve been telling myself this over and over. It seems to be working. I’ve thought of additional ideas that I can do to expand the blog to more than just my daily posting about life with Gastroparesis. I’ve thought of some possible ways to arm others with copies of the Advocacy Binder.
I’m excited about the future and hoping that you will be too. I’m hoping that you will like the changes coming soon to Adventures with Gastroparesis!
Never give up & keep your chin up! We will find a way to make our voices heard, just you wait & see!