This past week I felt like the photo above. I forced myself to keep going and eventually got to the finish line and even had a few folks help pull me across the finish line. However the week was a reminder that I will never be ‘normal’. I will never be able to just wake up and push myself to the limit and have it all be okay. I was reminded that there is only so much I can do in a week otherwise I have to go into hibernation to recharge my batteries.
Granted my Gastroparesis has been cooperating for the most part lately, but fatigue has set in to an extreme. The past week I felt constantly tired and never felt like I was fully awake. However I kept crawling along because that is what people with Gastroparesis do. The world doesn’t stop because you are tired so you put one foot in front of the other and do the best you can to get to the finish line, which in most cases is Friday afternoon. You find away to keep going, you’re not really sure how you do it but somehow you do. Somehow you manage to keep it together and take care of what needs done. Somehow you keep your eyes open. Somehow you make it another week.
This Friday was extra special, my fiance had plans to take me out to dinner for my birthday. However, I was exhausted and just wanted to put on my pjs and sleep. We decided to call an audible and go to a location closer to home. I somehow miraculously gained some spoons and we had a really nice night. I slept well into Saturday morning and was recharged enough to have some friends over for a bonfire. It was nice to see some dear friends that I haven’t seen in a few months. Today on the other hand, I have been lounging around watching tv and potentially reading a book. My batteries are slowly recharging to prepare for another week.
Gastroparesis might take its toll and make you crawl across the finish line, but there are always people around to pick you up. You just have to find the right people to surround yourself with because spending time with those people will give you more spoons than you can imagine.